Are gifts necessary?
Christmas is coming so I thought that this is a perfect opportunity to write about gifts.
About giving gifts.
Are gifts necessary?
Here is my opinion. Please understand that this is my point of view. If you have a different one, I respect you and I respect your opinion.
This post is for people who are open-minded and tolerant.
If you are interested in my point of view, let’s begin 🙂
1. How to define ‘a gift’
A gift for me is something that you give someone to tell her or him that you appreciate them.
- It is an unselfish act of kindness. When you expect something in return of your gift, it is not a real gift.
- A gift is something from your heart, something sincere.
- You give it without an agenda and an ulterior motive.
Not because you are supposed to but because you want to.
2. What can be a gift
Depending on the needs of whoever we want to give it to. And of course on our budget.
- It can be a physical object, an item of clothing, a book, a candle, a new car etc.
- Or it can be an experience. Holidays, a concert, bungee jumping etc.
Me being a minimalist, I am all for experiences instead of things.
Why is that?
Because I really don’t think that items can give us real happiness.
The kind of happiness that lasts for years and years.
Physical objects make us happy only for a little while. They bring joy not happiness.
After that period of excitement is over, we are back to being miserable.
And we want more gifts because they bring us temporary joy.
Then we go back to being miserable. Vicious circle.
Do you know people or know of people, who have everything but still are unhappy? Maybe you are even one of them?
3. Your time is the best gift
The time you decide to spend with your friends and family is the greatest gift of all.
Give people experiences. Spend time with them.
- Drink coffee and talk.
- Watch a movie together.
- Share a bottle of wine (or two;))
- Prepare and eat a nice dinner together.
- Help them in need.
- Take them to dancing classes.
You get my point.
Those are the gifts I truly value. I can bet that your family and friends would rather spend time with you than get a new watch, phone or some other item.
4. Collect moments not things
Now let’s get down to moments and experiences.
Can an experience be a gift? Of course! And a great one I can tell you 🙂
Give people experiences.
A concert ticket, a cinema ticket, nice dinner in a restaurant, movie night, guitar lessons, holidays. There are so many ideas!
Spend time with your family and friends, they will appreciate it.
Take your family for a ride, spend time with your children.
You don’t necessarily have to buy them things to show them how much they mean to you.
And we come to the next topic.
5. Do I have to buy people gifts?
No, you don’t. It’s as simple as that.
If you think that you are suppose to buy Christmas presents for everyone, I’m telling you that it’s not true.
I and my husband we don’t buy Christmas gifts. And you know what? Nobody stopped talking to us or liking us because of that.
No one will like you more just because you got them a gift. And nobody will hate you for not giving them a present.
If they do, this means that they’re not your true friends.
6. Should I stop buying gifts?
No, I didn’t say that.
All I want you to do is have an open mind and understand my point of view.
You can buy people gifts if you want to.
But first think why you buy presents.
- Do you buy someone gifts because of them or because of you?
- Do you do it to make them like or love you?
- Do you buy gifts so that you wouldn’t feel stupid that you are the only one with no presents?
- Do you buy a bunch of stuff because you are afraid of what others may say or think?
- Do you buy gifts because it makes you happy?
- Do you buy Christmas presents because everyone else does and what is Christmas without gifts?
- Do you buy a gift to show your appreciation and love?
- Is your gift going to help someone?
- Do you have no ulterior motive, no agenda and you don’t want anything in return?
7. I still want to buy a gift
Ok, if you still want to buy a gift for someone, that’s great.
I also buy gifts. I have nothing against it.
Don’t get me wrong, I am not some kind of a stingy person who never buys things for other people.
I do. But I give gifts even without any particular occasion.
I don’t wait untill Christmas to show someone my appreciation.
When I want to give someone a gift, I just do it no matter the time of year.
- If you have a friend or a family member who says that he or she doesn’t want or need gifts, give them an experience.
- If your friend doesn’t collect items, you can buy something to eat or drink. Tea, coffee, chocolate. Something that they can use up, like a candle.
- When you give someone a gift, don’t expect anything in return.
- When I want to buy someone a gift I ask them what they want or need. Or I figure something out.
But I always try to give things or experiences that this person may like and find useful.
- Remember that you don’t have to give presents that you can’t afford.
8. To sum up
- You don’t have to buy gifts just because it’s Christmas. You can do it all year round !
- When you have no money you really don’t have to take a loan to buy presents.
- You don’t have to buy expensive presents.
- You don’t have to buy gifts at all!
People expect gifts because one day they gave you something with an ulterior motive. And now they want something in return. But it’s not ok.
- If you want to buy something, buy a gift within your means, something that can be used or give an experience.
- Don’t expect anything in return. Your gift should be sincere.
- Give experiences.
9. So, to give or not to give gifts?
I won’t answer this question for you.
Think for yourself and make a decision.
All I want you to understand is that this should be your decision.
No one should decide for you. Step out of the herd and think for yourself.
And remember what the Grinch said:
P.S. Leave me a comment here or message me on Facebook. Let me know what you think. Write something positive and make my day 🙂